Craft a Possibility

Avery’s story — Part 1

A client’s well-being vision is like a lighthouse, their beacon. It is something they are moving towards, however, the pathway to the lighthouse is not linear. The beacon not only illuminates the path, it empowers them to stay the course. 

This is an analogy that comes to mind when thinking of Avery, a 33-year-old biracial female that entered coaching to explore lifestyle changes to manage her stage 1 hypertension diagnosis; she currently takes no medication and wants to maintain this. 

During my initial assessment call with Avery, I learned she recently graduated from grad school and is currently working as a counselor. Doing the work of a full-time plus part-time staff member, her work has started to bleed into her personal life. Along with incremental increases in work responsibilities, came an increase in her output of time and energy. 

This has led to Avery feeling burned out and stressed, while stripping her of time to engage in activities that supported her well-being.

As I continued the assessment, I gained an aerial view of Avery’s habits, interests, and hobbies, as well as how she managed the stressors in her life, her social support system, and ways she cares for herself. 

Avery disclosed her adoption of the DASH (Dietary Approaches to Stop Hypertension) diet to help with blood pressure concerns. She also explained that her nutritional/eating approach was an intuitive one — not restricting calories or certain kinds of foods, yet focusing attention on her sodium intake. Combining cardio, weight training, and yoga three to five times per week, she was also very active. 

Regarding sleep, there was room for improvement. Being in the “helping” profession, on-call, and having blurred work boundaries, Avery has to respond to her clients’ needs, ready and prepared to address their concerns; getting insufficient sleep has been the result.

Although maintaining a very hectic work schedule, Avery has been able to find some balance by taking part in such activities as roller skating, listening to live music, socializing with friends, and going on walks. Learning this about her, I felt it was a great time to ask, 

What do you feel is possible for your well-being in the next six to eight months, and how would you craft a possibility statement?”

Feeling unprepared to provide a definitive possibility statement related to what she envisioned for herself, she mentioned words and phrases like “authentically being me,” “self-agency,” “controlling my own narrative,” and “being in my own power.” All of which felt very present for her.

Because Avery was unable to articulate a vision, we paused and I invited her to consider the words and phrases she used and allow them to germinate between our sessions. And the next time we spoke, we would examine anything that came forth as a vision.  

Now, remember the analogy?

Avery’s “lighthouse” is her well-being vision. While she is moving towards it, the path has a few bumps and curves, impacting her ability to go straight to it. The good thing is, the light shining from the lighthouse is enabling her to see that something important lies ahead — where her vision becomes clear, therefore enabling it to come into fruition.   

After addressing her vision, the assessment shifted to us discussing her goals and what she wanted to achieve, which will be covered in Part 2 of Avery’s story, along with a life-changing event that pushed Avery to think deeper about her well-being goals.

Resist Unnecessary Urgency

Exploring the “how” more deeply requires slowing down to examine the way in which the organization’s cultural behaviors are [mis]aligned with its values and purpose. 

The speed of the changes our society is experiencing calls us to be curious about why something is the way it is, and be open to gaining a deeper understanding to guide how processes are evaluated:

  • By questioning the status quo.
  • Marshaling your critical thinking about what is working and what is not.
  • Coming to meaningful conclusions. 

This rests on the ability to listen more — hearing as many perspectives — while suspending judgments. It calls for “radical candor,” which embeds psychological safety.

Even writing the phrase “radical candor,” I sense some hesitation in my body. 

Given my professional experience, I recognize radical candor is on the spectrum. Also, each person brings their history and expectations to the conversation. As well, the person will only exhibit as much candor as they feel safe to do so, because individuals and organizations demonstrate behaviors that indicate it is safe to do so.

And we are all leaders in our own rights, even without a title.

Leading is a social process that involves a willingness to challenge the status quo, use critical thinking, and demonstrate humility, while being supported by a team.

No single leader has all the attributes needed to curate radical candor in their organization nor the ability to reflect the entirety of all, with all, for all, while remaining reasonable for most. 

By infusing psychological safety into the organization, leaders ensure and show their willingness to expand their understanding, the belief that it’s okay to be uncomfortable and encourage team members to get to the essence of difficult topics in an open and supportive manner.

A powerful social element of leadership is that it can inspire individuals to bring their best to the organization. Radical candor — psychological safety — benefits the organization and the workforce’s well-being. It imbues a feeling of being seen, heard, and respected, resulting in less stressed employees.

Resist Unnecessary Urgency

And organizations shoot themselves in the foot when they push their talent to be more productive by pressing them to work longer hours — totting up their key performance indicators (KPI), a dressed-up phrase for productivity — at the cost of their employees’ well-being.

What would happen if, as leaders, we took into account how we encourage and measure goals that prioritize employees’ well-being and how we motivate performance?

With the byproduct of a well organization, which is purpose-driven, creative, and healthy, inspiration occurs when new possibilities are seen.

There is a receptivity to outside influence, and there is a feeling of being energized. 

Inspiration is inspired by purpose.

And when leaders reveal their purpose and how it aligns with the organization’s purpose — they inspire their talent to do the same.

Leaders who encourage employees to define their passion by aligning their actions with the organization’s purpose recognize the impact their work has on others and experience greater satisfaction.

As Gartner’s research shows, employees want a more “human value proposition.” They are asking for autonomy over where and when they work, engaging and applying themselves in a purposeful way.

A well organization values their talent.

They curate a culture by understanding what inspires and increases the performance of their talent.

When leaders slow down to speed up — they take care to care for their talent. Employees are less stressed, enjoy achieving good results, and are comfortable being themselves. 

Employees can only bring their full abilities to bear when they have time to process and think creatively.

In our hypervigilant, hustle culture, where productivity is supreme and time is a status, how are we leaving space for what’s difficult and uncomfortable by redefining what it means for you and your organization to engage and inspire performance?