Possibilities Within Aging

Antonio Case Study (reposted with a refresh)

The aging process is a very individual process; one of many conclusions Antonio reached during our coaching sessions. 

Antonio, a retiree in his mid-60s, faced the next stage of life — from what to do and how to fill the hours in his day to the entirety of the aging process. With all his free time, he pondered what was important to him. 

As he put it, “Self was not the highest priority over the last 25 years, as work and family dominated daily life”.  

After referring to the wellness program offered by his health organization, wellness coaching piqued his interest. Seeking to find his personal happiness and a new balance of his daily time, coaching seemed to be the answer; to have someone to discuss a range of topics, inclusive of body, mind, and spirit. 

Our initial coaching session consisted of inquiring about Antonio’s current lifestyle habits, emotional well-being, and health history to get a sense of what was most important to him in regard to a coaching relationship. 

With the stated vision of ‘a greater quality of life into the 60s – 70s and beyond’, our sessions began with a discussion around ageism vs aging; Antonio leaned more into aging.

According to the World Health Organization’s (WHO): aging at the biological level, results from the impact of the accumulation of a variety of molecular and cellular damage over time, leading to a gradual decrease in physical and mental capacity, a growing risk of disease and ultimately death. 

This definition guided following sessions, as it was used as an opportunity for Antonio to look inward to define his personal journey. We discussed his observations of other 60 – 70 year olds, his 20-year old sons, and his in-laws who are in their 80s. 

His obvious takeaway was the carefree lifestyle of a 20-year old. They are trying to define their lifestyle between their work life, social life, and their personal journey. When age 65 comes around, the reality of time and aging sets in; an age when the question of, “what is important in my daily life?” looms. 

Acknowledging the huge gaps and life stages in between those ages, Antonio came to the realization that there is no roadmap. One should celebrate each day and work towards what makes that day fulfilling. 

Keeping in mind his realization, our discussions were positioned around Antonio’s well-being and what he desired for his aging process, which consisted of:

  • Physical well-being (weight management, hydration, balanced nutrition, exercise and pain management)
  • Emotional well-being/intellectual stimulation (volunteerism and team-building activities)
  • Soulful relationships (time with family, specifically his sons)

Understanding that his health would naturally change, year over year, Antonio was open and willing to embrace behavioral changes, resulting in him actively increasing his daily water intake, exploring bodywork therapies (ie. a mix of physical therapy, chiropractic care, massage, and acupuncture) to manage/alleviate pain, and daily stretching and exercising.

Through deeper discussions and guided questions, I discovered emotional well-being for Antonio was in the space of mental acuity and the ways in which he could bring his professional acumen to his community. 

As we explored many topics, he was most interested in starting a long-term initiative to promote multi-model trail paths to support cyclists and pedestrians of all ages and abilities – a desire to transform his community in a positive way.

Regarding his relationship with family, especially his sons, I challenged Antonio to refine his perspectives. I wanted to enable him to comfortably discuss with his sons the things shaping their values and lifestyles, based on today’s societal norms, without imposing his thoughts and opinions. I wanted Antonio to give himself the space to allow a greater appreciation for their changing maturation process, including his own. 

As our coaching sessions continued, Antonio remained consistent in making steps toward his desired behavioral changes; he would often report seeing results that said, “fuel his next steps”. 

At a specific point during our time together, he mentioned realizing that he was, in fact, maintaining the levels he established and if he kept pace, the coming years would be a success. 

Although every session is purely focused on my client, my time with Antonio was a reminder that we are all on the aging path, and we should be open to experience each day as it comes, knowing tomorrow we may not have the same opportunity. 

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Novelette A. DeMercado, MS, PCC, CPDC, NBHWC
Founder/Chief Possibility Director

I’m drawn to the process of learning – the possibilities it holds – of things yet to be realized. Continuously expanding the sphere of understanding is a delight that transports the imagination. I set high expectations for myself, which signals confidence in my capacity to deliver outstanding results. Completing the task is its own reward and that internal drive motivates the journey.

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