Blog Archives - BETA Coaching & Consulting

Discovering Opportunities in Resistance

January 14, 2025January 15, 2025

Looking at Resistance

Resistance, what is it about? This is something I will be exploring in 2025, and I’ll admit, I have plenty of it:

Resistance to being interrupted when I’m speaking.
Resistance to someone assuming they know what I’m thinking.
Resistance to resistance itself (a touch of humor here, but true nonetheless).
Resistance to being flattened by AI algorithms.

You might be thinking, “Novelette, get over yourself,” or perhaps not! The truth is, many of us experience resistance in one form or another, and it can sometimes grow into a limiting belief. But I’m not here to label this as good or bad—and I’m certainly not giving myself a pass.

Resistance can be the refusal to comply with or accept something, which might be linked to a fear one holds. For example:

When I feel resistance to being interrupted or silenced, it may ignite a fear of being made invisible. And who wants to be made to feel invisible by another?
When I resist someone’s assumptions about who I am, it negates my own sense of being heard or welcomed. This disconnect can erode the feeling of connectedness many of us deeply value.
When I resist my own resistance, it feels like a double-edged sword—the original discomfort, followed by the added weight of feeling like I “shouldn’t” resist at all.

But what if resistance is also a teacher?

When we approach resistance with curiosity instead of judgment, we gain the opportunity to name what’s emerging and explore how it might serve our well-being. As one definition puts it:

“Well-being can be understood as how people feel and function on both a personal and social level, and how they evaluate their lives as a whole.” (What Is Wellbeing? —PMC)

So, when a family member, friend, or colleague seems resistant, how curious are you about their perspective? Are you willing to engage in a conversation to find common ground—or even build on the differences to create something new? After all, sameness stifles creativity, while diverse perspectives open the door to broader insights.

Change cannot happen without resistance. It’s through resistance that we reaffirm our values and identify where we need to grow. Ignoring it only postpones the inevitable, and in some cases, leads to stagnation or missed opportunities.

Lately, I’ve been examining my own resistance to AI—not all AI, but specifically the applications designed to “streamline” human interaction. In other words, how I relate with my clients. A team I worked with was eliminated after management decided to digitize the work using AI, believing it would achieve similar, if not greater, results while serving more people. With the belief in the magic of human connection, I balked at the idea that AI could be the solution to the well-being crisis our society has faced for years.

In February’s blog, I’ll share more about my resistance to AI and how it might be holding me back, but also how it could be an opportunity to rethink the way I engage with clients. This is a deeply personal exploration, one that invites reflection, as noted above on the reflection card.

How do you long to be in 2025? What will you explore and give up to meet that longing well?

As you move into this new year, I invite you to embrace all parts of the process as teachers. Resist the temptation to label things as simply desirable or undesirable, and instead, bring curiosity to who you’re becoming, and to the whole lives of those around you.

May you be well-situated to meet the opportunities ahead.

Source of Inspiration

What I'll be reading

At the 2019 Vision & Justice conference at Harvard University, Joy Buolamwini sounded the alarm about self-driving cars not being programmed to recognize Black faces and about us [as a society] being cautious about AI. As a reluctant adopter of AI—particularly tools like ChatGPT—I’ve been challenging myself to explore this resistance. To deepen my understanding, I’ll be reading Unmasking AI in January, alongside various articles to expand my perspective.

Song that inspires

Reflection

Resistance—what is it about? Where am I stagnating, missing out on a potential opportunity? Is this resistance pointing to something of greater value?

While I Still Have Your Attention

Thanks for reading BETA’s Blog; I hope you found the content thought-provoking, inspiring your exploration of how you long to be in 2025.

Well-being is subjective and universally desired. It involves functioning both on a personal and social level, and evaluating one’s life as a whole.

If you like the newsletter, please share it with your friends and family. And if you’ve yet to subscribe, I’d love to have you join our distribution list (which is never shared).

Let’s connect on social, too! You can find me on LinkedIn.

Sustainable Well-Being: A Journey, Not a Destination

November 18, 2024November 19, 2024

When working with organizations to establish well-being sustainability, several key factors play a role in developing an effective framework.

These factors are unique to each environment and workforce, considering shifting tides—be they economic trends, individual and global health concerns, or environmental and political climates.

Organizations often lean toward popular, one-size-fits-all steps to improve workforce well-being, but these quick fixes may not apply across the board. In fact, there’s a risk of homogenizing solutions that ignore the nuances of each team or company culture. A sustainable well-being framework should offer a structured approach, but it must also remain flexible to meet the specific needs of individuals within the organization.

Well-being connects to the fulfillment of needs, which suggests an ongoing journey rather than a final destination. Despite this, companies frequently look for quick fixes to complex, deeply human challenges. Well-being isn’t purely personal; it’s embedded within the social structures, communities, and support systems we all rely on. It’s shaped by the resources—or lack thereof—that people can access.

At BETA, we created a well-being sustainability framework that encourages organizations to take a holistic approach. The framework focuses on improving individual well-being while fostering positive interactions within the team and the environment. Central to this framework is a coaching approach, where participants engage as equals, grounded in trust, transparency, choice, and a willingness to pivot.

Just as seeds germinate in their own time, the impacts of this framework may take a while to unfold. Some efforts blossom quickly, while others need time to root deeply before showing visible growth. The organization’s “soil” (its culture, systems, resources, and contributors) affects every step. Clarifying core values and supporting each contributor helps everyone align in a shared commitment to well-being.

In the end, our collective well-being relies on mutual support within our interconnected ecosystem. While well-being is universally desired, it’s not universally accessible. Embracing different perspectives and holding space for all voices is essential.

Audre Lorde writes in her essay Poetry is not a luxury (1985), “For women, then, poetry is not a luxury. It is a vital necessity of our existence.” I couldn’t agree more. Through poetry, we confront the vulnerability of human existence, recalling what was and giving voice to our deepest longings—a necessity, not a luxury, for our shared humanity.

I recently came across Forest of the Lost by Mosab Abu Toha while watching PBS news hour and purchased the book the same week. To say this collection is heart-wrenching feels like an understatement—words can’t fully capture the weight of war, loss, and survival.

Reading poetry is one of my loves—it is a way to be transported from the thinking mind to the heart center, to feel into the words on the pages. I am leaving you with this poem from the collection.

Before I Sleep

Before I sleep,
Death is always
sitting on my windowsill,
whether in Gaza or Cairo.

Even when I lived
in a tent,
it never failed
to create a window
for itself.

It looks me in the eye
and recounts to me
that many times
it let me live.

When I respond, “But you
took my loved ones away!”
it swallows the light in the tent
and hides in the dark to visit next day.

Poems are magic ceremonies of language, writes Byung-Chul Han.

Sharing this tune for your listening pleasure:

Let’s Connect

Schedule an appointment at novelette@betacoachingconsulting.com for a presentation on the well-being sustainability framework!

Harmoniously Working Together

July 10, 2024July 6, 2024

Billions of individuals, including yourself, are busy working. Many toil away in environments that are not supportive of their values, talents, and skills. And a small percentage of these individuals are flourishing.

What is the secret sauce for those who flourish?

Or could it be less of a secret sauce and more of a consistent, constructive effort on the part of all parties—leaders, people managers, human resources managers, and employees—to shape the organizational culture we all feel engaged?

A tall order—yet very doable!

Although engagement is linked to performance (such as quiet quitting, performance appraisal scores, and turnover), it does not directly impact individuals’ performance; it is an organizational imperative involving all stakeholders.

Consider that you will veer off course as you experiment with how you want to interact with and within your organizational culture, given this is a huge learning experiment involving novel—and not so novel—concepts of working together harmoniously.

Be prepared for failure as new terrains are navigated.

In her book, The Right Kind of Wrong, Amy Edmonston writes, “Failures are all but guaranteed when uncertainty is high,” and experimentation is necessary to make progress.

Experimentation requires time, given the rapidly changing global and diverse workforce we are part of!

Engagement is a function of the cultural value-add—shaping the energy, behaviors, and attitudes over and above personal preferences and styles.

It is important to understand how the organization’s stakeholders function and collaborate, while considering varying social identities and values, to serve the organization’s mission and values.

Strategies and ideas for enhancing employee engagement were discussed at BETA’s The Engagement Factor virtual event last month.

After reviewing the Employee Engagement Framework below, consider how you are meaningfully engaged in your work life.

An Employee Engagement Framework

Organizations represent individuals and groups with shared identities, norms, and purposes.

People generally feel more enthusiastic about their work when empowered to achieve something meaningful to connect with others.

This framework provides a structure to build upon, creating milestones, and resulting in a clear strategy for how you might wish to engage with your workforce.

It is perfectly imperfect.

Attention needs to be given to the individual parts and how they relate to one another. At times, it can be beyond our ability to predict or control all the parts.

Yet we are receiving useful information for consideration on how and where you would like to experiment next within the framework—pivoting.

Missed the virtual event?

Here is a summary of what the participants shared…

Email novelette@betacoachingconsulting.com to receive a copy of the white paper.

Any time of the year is a perfect time to slow down and enjoy the moment. Yet summer is a particularly sweet time to sit under a tree and get lost in a book or the beauty of the natural landscape.

Check out my reading list for the summer—and please share what is on your list!

Wishing you a summer filled with people, events, and activities (no activities) that jazz you up.

Stepping into the Realm of Possibilities

June 12, 2024June 7, 2024

The level of employee engagement hinges on their sense of fulfillment in their contributions to the organization, their colleagues, and their own growth. This is equally influenced by the organization’s demonstrated behaviors and actions.

Saying they have created a culture of care where employees can be themselves and contribute fully isn’t enough for an organization. Their actions throughout the company must consistently reflect this value.
How employees choose to engage will depend on their need to feel fully realized in their contributions to the organization, their colleagues, and themselves.

As well as the organization’s demonstrated behaviors and actions.

I have had the good fortune to collaborate with fabulous leaders professionally. Leaders that honed their leadership, intrapersonal, and people skills, in a manner that enabled their direct reports to contribute meaningfully.

Engaging fully!

Company culture: a balance of what you say and do

And there were those leaders, through their behavior (from micromanagement and bullying to sexist and racist tropes), that resulted in my stepping back in how to choose to engage.

Resulting in a self-protective mechanism of armoring and then camouflaging.

You may be thinking that I might have been overly sensitive. And I could have been. Yet, the environment did not feel trustworthy.

For me, at the heart of employee engagement is choice—saying yes to an organizational value because it aligns with one’s personal values.

This belief holds that choice exhibits one’s personal power in an ecosystem that has cultivated multiple pathways to engage.

Engagement is about meaningful interactions and curating a mutually beneficial partnership.

My experiences with these ineffective leaders helped me define the kind of leadership and work environment that fosters my ability to contribute my full potential; bringing my best self to work.

There are safe enough environments to experiment with novel ideas, stepping into the realm of possibilities. People riff off each other in a supportive, cross-functional, collaborative manner, using time and space to create.

Do you feel that you’re engaged meaningfully in your work life?

There is no universal formula for engaging employees. Given the workforce’s global nature and diverse needs, some behaviors can help amplify engagement across an enterprise.

You’re cordially invited to The Engagement Factor, an interactive virtual event that offers approaches to cultivating engagement across your organization.

I have greatly enjoyed serving on a Board with Anu Gupta at BE MORE with Anu (BMA). I have seen first-hand his passion for providing individuals and organizations with ancient wisdom, blending it with modern science, to bridge understanding and strengthen compassion across differences.

Anu brings mindfulness-based and science-backed DEIB, antiracism, and wellness training to organizations of all sizes to build more equitable and inclusive workplaces and beloved communities.

His BMA Organizational Coaching Program is a unique opportunity to collaborate directly to drive tangible behavior change, understanding, and compassion.

Registration is open!

I invite you to check it out: BMA Organizational Coaches | BE MORE With Anu — BE MORE with Anu.

Finding Joy in the Unexpected

April 20, 2024April 23, 2024

Wrapping up a week of museum outings, enjoying the burgeoning spring days, and visiting with friends, reacclimating to a schedule of deadlines has been slow going.

It is a privilege to interrupt one’s [hectic] pace to intentionally slow down. A privilege that many cannot realize for various reasons.

Even how I traveled (by train, which was more money and a longer travel time than by air) was a practice in being unhurried.

Only one activity planned for each of the seven days with lots of room to engage in what emerged fully.

Csikszentmihalyi writes that if one uses leisure to engage … flow will be present. For me, flow happened through immersion in creative spaces, concentrated time with friends, and the delight of a relatively unstructured schedule, to be.

We could say I was engaging in relatively effortless flow experiences. With the primary action of choosing to engage.

In a society where doing is prized, being leisurely can seem luxurious. Leisure time may signal that we are unproductive! Not being a contributor. Playing instead of working. A binary mindset of this or that.

“Leisure is not refreshment-for-work but something completely different that exists for its own sake,” writes Jenny Odell in Saving Time.

Although I started off talking about leisure time, the crux of this blog is how to s.l.o.w. d.o.w.n. to be in the m.o.m.e.n.t. to experience (be in) the landscape of our lives. And I don’t believe you must leave your home to do this.

Taking time for a slower, non-work pace can be difficult if we are paid to produce using our intellect. The speed at which we produce and how we are rewarded, whether title or salary, can be external signals of our worth. Our success.

What would slowing down allow you to experience when you’re not driven to produce?

This slow-flow adventure was sparked by an NPR Report on the reopening of the National Museum of Women in the Arts—with the desire to see the Sky’s the Limit exhibit.

Unfortunately, I was three days late; the exhibit had closed. Yet being in the museum’s space sufficiently quenched my disappointment.

There were multiple moments of serendipity within my seven days of adventure; visiting a bunch of museums, connecting with friends, and walking around a new city. The edges of Chronos‘ time, greatly influenced by Kairos‘ time.

On my final day at the National Museum of the American Indian on the National Mall, there was an announcement that playwright, Rhianna Yazzie, would be in the auditorium to offer a talk. With no previous knowledge of her or her work, I decided to attend.

During her talk, she dropped many gems. I was particularly struck by one of many questions she posed, which I offer to you for reflection:

How do you create a composite for yourself?

After experiencing a life tremor (a long overdue change) at the end of 2023, I deliberately paused before moving forward to the next thing. As I navigate this period of re-evaluation, I’m finding deeper purpose aligned with my values, shaping my journey ahead.

With many factors outside my control, I wanted to give space around this life shift. After managing some time-sensitive matters, I gave myself the gift of what I like to call my “slow-flow adventure”.

Despite many aspects being beyond my direct control, I still have the power to determine how I respond to life’s twists and turns.

Head over to our LinkedIn Page.

Check out our monthly highlighted book.

Here is a sampling of the books read in the past three months.

Being Present In Life’s Rhythms

April 2, 2024April 3, 2024

After some internal dialogue about the need to ‘get cracking’ and put my thoughts down, coherently, for this monthly issue, it wasn’t happening.

Looking at the calendar and realizing I was behind schedule (according to the artificial timetable I had established for myself) — and asking, “How would I be able to pull something together in a timely fashion”? — resulted in a little quiver.

BETA’s communication strategy is charted 14 months in advance, driven by Chronos‘ time mindset towards a drive to have a time-bound plan. I felt this pull to plow through and write something for this month’s installment. Something was better than nothing, right?

Would that something be of value to me to share with you, our readers?

The idea of not producing a monthly blog made me feel like I was falling short.

Curious about the lesson in this discomfort, I reflected on potential factors that might explain this feeling.

To be honest, I took to heart the communication engagement report I got — it showed low views and readership. I interpreted as the content I was writing about wasn’t good enough to appeal to the reader. I questioned myself, “didn’t I just write about that”? 😊 “How come I wasn’t heeding my own advice”?

There is enjoyment in writing content that I perceive you, the reader, might find useful — and that enjoyment does not appear in algorithms.

Plus, the occurrence of daylight savings time was not helpful. While many welcome the change of time (longer daylight this time of year), I dread the changing of the clock. My biological clock gets confused for a few weeks, which can be destabilizing.

After some self-coaching, a good night’s sleep, and a clearer head, I gave myself permission to change course.

Listening deeply to my inner wisdom resulted in modifying the communication strategy established six months ago — a conscious choice to flow with the now.

This issue is an invitation to embrace our natural pace — being in Kairos time — to see where in your life you can change course to give yourself space and grace to be in the moment.

Head over to our LinkedIn Page.

Check out our monthly highlighted book.

Here is a sampling of the books read in the past three months.

Seeking two pro bono coaching clients.

I will petition the International Federation of Coaching (ICF) for consideration for the Master Certified Coach (MCC) Credential* this summer.

A requirement of the process is the submission of two recorded coaching sessions. I am seeking two volunteer coaching clients to participate in four (4) one–hour coaching sessions over two months (commencing May 2024), with a fifth debriefing session.

The sessions will be recorded, and two will be submitted to ICF for review.

If you are interested in participating in these sessions and can commit to the five sessions, please complete this Coaching Intake Form by April 19th. We are scheduling a 30-minute meet and greet for the week of April 22 to determine ‘coaching chemistry’.

*A Master Certified Coach (MCC) demonstrates mastery of the International Coaching Federation Core Competencies for coaching and its Code of Ethics. The MCC distinguishes coaches who demonstrate a depth of knowledge. It is designed for seasoned, expert coaches who provide coaching services as a primary focus of their professional practice and engage in advanced level coaching education throughout their career.